Monday, January 16, 2006

Sweet Revenge With The Blatant Truth

It seems to be inevitable and an universal rule to have an annoying person in the office to balance that whole 'yin/yang' or 'good/bad' qi in the office environment, just like how things work in the eco system where you need to have the predators on the prey and the most ferocious predator will in turn succumb to the smallest of all micro-organism. It's a vicious cycle. Hence, very seldom you will find an office full of pleasant colleagues, if there is one, I would say its either the devils in disguise, or its truly Utopia on earth.

So, needless to say, there is an annoying girl in my office, whom when spoken to will reply (or the lack of) with a pug look-alike crumpled face and a flatter than the runway come-slap-me tone. For the love of God, knowing full well that she has successfully pissed off many of the nicer people in the office, including the 66 year-old tea lady, I made it a point to stay away from her just so to ensure that her dignity is safe from any form of tramping from yours truly.

I guess sometimes when I try to be nice, I am just not given the chance to.

One sunny afternoon, just when I was feeling all frustrated and agonised by some stupid client, she had to come running to my desk, with her fats bouncing off the ground that caused a minor turbulence to the air current in my department, and demanded me to show her an article which had her roti prata face published in it. Holding back the urge to kick her into her Michelin stomach (for the fear of getting suck into the black hole) I pulled out the article and slapped it in front of her face.

"Aiyooo, so big ar the picture!!" -- she sounded like a kampong-market-going-mountain-tortoise from a rural well in Timbuktu, fishing for attention and I was not giving any to her.

"Aiyooo..." she attempted again to get my (or anyone's) attention, fully unaware of what was going to hit her next.

".....the picture take until I look so fat lah....aiyooo....so picture take until I look so ugly...." She laughed hysterically at her own statement. To say that she sounded like a hyena was an understatement.

I finally decided to give her the attention she was dying for. I lifted my head that was buried into my monitor, turned to face her and gave her a darting cold stare like how an agitated corpse would. I slowly parted my lips, cold mist dispersed into the thin air making everything frosty, and hissed the deadly truth and probably the last words she would be hearing from me....

"What do you expect that ugly face of yours to look like in the picture?"

2 Comments:

Anonymous SuperModel said...

fat & ugly ppl shld go die!

9:38 PM, January 17, 2006  
Blogger Lady Venom said...

there is nothing wrong nor sinful nor whatsoever negativity attached to being less than beautiful on the outside. that is not my point either as I am not superficial (skin-deep) like that...if you are I am sorry to know.

What i am saying is, along with that kind of annoying and arrogrant attitude, no matter what outlook she has, she still appears FUCKING UGLY TO ME!!

I am merely stating the fact and hopefully she will get the hint TO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!!

1:51 PM, January 18, 2006  

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